When I was a youth pastor, I was leading a youth camp with my wife, and we found out one of the young teenage girls was self-harming. We called her parents and they took her home. She was livid at us and screamed at us “I thought you were supposed to be my friends”. I said “you have many friends, but we are your pastors”. Sometimes pastors try and be the friends of their church members, and it doesn’t always end well.
I am not saying be unfriendly, I am not saying hide yourself away, fly in and preach and fly out. There is a ditch on both sides of the road here – you are supposed to be the pastor, you are supposed to command some honour and respect, but you are not supposed to be nasty, mean, selfish and foolish. You do not say “you better respect me or else” – but you live in a way that brings respect. People in your church have loads of friends, but you are the one who feeds them, teaches them, preaches to them, brings life and power and the gifts to them, ministers to them, equips them, lifts them, and pastors them.
You cannot go around everyone’s house just to have dinner with them or a nice cup of tea. It does not work – they will sit there and tell you everything wrong with you, your wife and the whole church. They will tell you all the things you should be doing. There is a distance that needs maintained.
You know the pastor does not have to stand around after church and shake everyone’s hand. Let me tell you a secret – no one at the end of the church wants to shake your hand and say thank you for that awesome, wonderful, glorious message. They want to go home and eat their lunch The people who will queue to meet you on Sunday are much more likely to preach to you than thank you for preaching to them.
Of course as a pastor, you fellowship with your congregation, you bless them – but your ministry is not measured by how well you visit people and have tea with them, it is measured by how well you preach, teach and equip them to minister. It is measured by the good food you feed them.
I have noticed the ones that want your one-to-one time the most are the people who are not with the church programme. They are not regular in attendance, they are not at the conferences, they are not in small groups, they do not tithe, they turn up late, they don’t listen during the sermon, they are simply not involved. They mistakenly see the role of the pastor as their friend, as someone to get in the pit with them and feel sorry for them. I have had people expect me to find them a job, stop them feeling lonely, even fix their washing machine. But these people are the same people who will not allow me to teach them how win in life, will miss church because they are tired, and “don’t do small groups” as if that dismisses everything.
We need to ensure that we do not let the people determine our job description, we have to let the Word determine that, and our job is not dress up as a sheep and make them like us, our job is to lead people to green pastures and still waters, and prepare a feast for them in the presence of their enemies, and ensure their cup is running over. That’s what you do.
Part of the pastoral calling is a deep love for people. Now I have been pastoring people for a while, sometimes I get into the middle of that. I might tell one of my pastors that such and such is not doing well, or is not ready to lead worship or whatever, and they will defend their sheep with such a passion against any perceived insult.
I understand that, and I talked in my last post about the truth that true pastors would honestly die for their sheep. But what I want to say today to every pastor reading this is never put the people before God. Don’t preach to people without going to God first, don’t pastor people without going to God first, don’t correct people without going to God first. Do not ever promote people without going to God first.
The high priest would go into the Most Holy Place and pour the blood on the mercy seat, then only after that would he come out and sprinkle blood on the people. When you preach you are sprinkling blood on people, sharing with them the power of the blood, the principles of the kingdom, and the goodness of the Lord. Do not sprinkle blood you have not brought into the Most Holy Place – get in with God and spend time with Him! You need a routine that before you minister to the people, you set aside time with the Lord and pray and meditate and get the mind of the Lord.
Don’t just pull a couple of Scriptures together and think that is a sermon. Don’t just copy something you heard Kenneth Copeland or Andrew Wommack say and think you are going to bring life and freedom to people. There will be a blessing because the Word brings a blessing, but you need to find out the exact right message for your people. That takes time with the Lord.
I do not get up to preach to entertain people. I do not get up to preach with an agenda. I am very aware that I standing before many people with many needs. I am very aware that I do not have the wisdom or grace to bring life to everyone. Every time I stand in a pulpit, I am very much like Paul, with fear and trembling. I think of myself like the little boy in the gospels – all I have is five loaves and two fish, what is that for so many, but as I spend time with Jesus and walk with Him and His grace, I find that in His strength and wisdom and glory, the limited food I have is multiplied and everyone in the room is fed.
It’s funny sometimes, I can preach a sermon and I can have ten people tell me that God fed them, that God spoke to them through those messages, that it has changed their life. Then one person will come and say something derogatory for whatever reason. You have to realize that is like someone watching Jesus multiply the loaves and fishes and complain that they don’t like tilapia or that the bread isn’t organic, gluten-free. Every time you hear a sermon from a preacher that has been with Jesus, you are in an atmosphere of multiplication.
That’s why as a pastor, you need to get into that atmosphere in private, just you and the Lord, and the blood – then when you emerge, you sprinkle the blood over people and people are set free, and healed, and saved. It’s awesome.
In other words, what you give people has to be what you have received from the Lord. If you do not spend time with the Lord, you have nothing to say. I preach twice most Sundays, and at least once mid-week every week. I have preached the same sermon twice about ten times, and even then it never ends up the same sermon twice. How can I do that – I have been with the Lord. When we are with the Lord, our feeble bread and fish can feed crowds and still have more left over for tomorrow. Not only that, when we sow that – we will have a harvest of revelation for ourselves! What a deal.
There is much more in the Word, I mean seriously much much more, than any of us no matter who we are have tapped into. So, dig deep and take the time – it’s part of our calling.
Put God before the sheep. Go and spend time with God and do not let the people interrupt that.
I worked the best part of eighteen hours yesterday, answering emails, praying for people, sorting out expenses, sorting out copyright licences. I have just managed to get an hour at the gym today, and came back, and I probably have about ten hours work to go still. I am not saying this for sympathy, I love my job, I love my calling and I love what I do.
But I came home, and someone was complaining about something that was so silly and immature, then immediately I had an email from someone upset they were not allowed to minister in the church (trust me, I did you all a favour by not letting him), and then I heard someone tell me a horrible nasty rumour someone was trying to spread about me!
What a day! I said to my wife: why do we do this job?! It was just a throwaway comment, a joke but as I said it the Lord reminded me of a Scripture. It says this “Jesus began to show his disciples that He must go to Jerusalem, and suffer many things from the elders and chief priests and be killed…” (Matthew 16.21). A good shepherd – a good pastor – you will have to lay down your life for the sheep! That’s the truth.
I’m not saying you have to actually take a bullet – that wouldn’t help your church at all, but you have to die to your desires, your wants, your agenda, and pick up your cross and the serve the people God has entrusted you no matter what. There is not a moment where you get to serve yourself and your wants, and if you think otherwise, you will always be disappointed as a pastor!
You need to make sure you spend enough time with the Lord Jesus, the Good Shepherd, that you embrace the same attitude He has, that you learn from Him and His humility and His kindness, and reflect Him to people too immature to see Him in the spirit. Jesus once said “My food is to do the will of Him who sent me” (John 4.24) and that is the place we need to reach as pastors. Your food cannot be a thank you – you may never get one, your food cannot be someone being loyal to you – they might stab you in the back, your food cannot be people understanding you – they won’t, your food cannot be people hearing the Word and growing, because often they won’t. Your only food can be: I did what Jesus told me to do. I did what He called me to do. I followed Jesus. When you reach this point, you catch fire for Jesus and nothing else matters and no one else matters and then you can truly serve people in the right way.
Now when I say die to yourself, I do not mean you exhaust yourself serving people, because then you cannot help anyone. You have to look after yourself. When I started the church, I would never take a day off, I would work non-stop for days, and then normally after about 25-30 days, I would wake up and be utterly unable to get out of bed. The Lord wouldn’t heal me because I wasn’t sick, I was exhausted and had to then take a forced Sabbath. Since then I have grown up and I now get my sabbath right. When its my day of rest, trust me I rest. Pastors, rest! Take your sabbath. Now remember sabbath is only 1 in 7, don’t become those pastors who are never working, I have met them and it’s insane. You know what I mean – you go on their Facebook and you think they have retired. They are always resting and always relaxing.
Listen, it’s not easy being a pastor and laying down your life for the sheep, but there is a grace for it. The calling gives you the grace and wisdom to lay down your life. Jesus Himself set you as a pastor, and He will train you and disciple you. He will put more senior pastors in your life to help you. And when it’s a big struggle, look at Jesus and say “thank you for making me a pastor, and thank you for the grace to deal with this”.
Now, I know that you all as pastors know that as sheep we all know the voice of the good shepherd, and that is absolutely true. But the truth is also that the sheep in your church should know your voice.
Now that starts with you knowing the voice of the Lord. You need to be spending time in the Word, listening to sermons, reading good Christian books, praying in tongues, and being in services and conferences on a regular basis. If you are not doing that, then why on earth would you expect others in your church would even be close to doing anything like that!
Now once you are doing that, your sheep should know your voice. You see an actual shepherd of literal sheep is the number one feeder of his sheep. Because he is the feeder, they learn to trust him so they tune into his voice. That’s how a shepherd becomes the leader of the flock, by being the feeder of the flock. Your job as a pastor is not to control your sheep, it is to feed them. As you feed them over and over, they will tune into your voice and start to follow you. That’s the process of pastoral leader, you feed people until they trust you to take care of them.
Then when someone teaches some strange doctrine, or gives them a strange prophetic word, they will come to you and say, shepherd, is this good food to eat, because they know that you look after them.
Now there are two problems to this idyllic situation. Firstly, some in your church, as we have said previously, are goats. They will not just eat your food, they will eat as much as they can – they will listen to anyone and everyone. They are the people in your church sharing CDs and links to random preachers that are preaching weird things that do not bring life, conspiracy theories, Bible Codes and normally extreme and dangerous teachings such as universalism and inclusionism. They will often be more linked to a Bible College or a ministry than another church, as they find these things more exciting than the mundane consistency of being in a church. They will become little whisperers of other voices in the church, destabilising your ability to lead the flock.
Secondly, there will be those who are offended. They will not trust your voice and they will depending on their personality will either overtly or covertly assault the authority of your voice. The overt assault will be telling people that you are a cult leader, all brain and no heart, more of a teacher than a pastor. The covert and sneaky assault will be “I really love listening to this guy on the radio, here is a link to his website”, “I feel that the church needs to do more in the community” – and much more.
The covert assault will sneak past many people’s radar as an insult or assault because it will often start with “I really like/ love our pastor, but you know he works so hard, why does he travel so much, if I was the pastor I would do more for you” – it’s what has often been called a spirit of Absalom, David’s son who promised everyone a better life if he was made king. Often, because these people are cowards, they will also preface their comments with “I have heard from some people”, “other people are saying” so they do not have to own their negative, critical voices. Another covert assault against your voice is “what the church needs is to catch fire with the Holy Spirit”, and what is meant is we all need a chance to get up and say something, we want more time in worship, but less time hearing the Word, and we want less order. That’s not always the heart behind that kind of comment, but often it comes from an attitude of superiority. Or, one more assault goes like this: “this church was better in the old days, it was more like family, more spiritual or whatever, let’s pray we get back to that”. It could be translated I don’t like growth, structure or new people.
Something I have heard recently and it has happened to others and myself too, is that people will loudly praise others who I know have been rude, immature, and ungodly around me.
Often these people who they are praising are so offended they do not even go to church, and someone will come to me and go “This person (the person who raised his fists to you, the person who tried to divide your family, the person who doesn’t go to church, the person who has lied over and over, the person who stole money from the church, the person who has never given a penny to the church) is such a great Christian, they love this church so much, it’s such a shame they are no longer here”.
That is a powerful assault against the voice of the pastor, making it out as if he is the reason the other people is no longer in the church, it is a misguided idea that when someone leaves a church in rebellion and spite, there are two sides to every story. It means that person is listening to multiple voices and therefore is not being fed as well and will not grow well! And they are undermining your voice by what they are saying.
Now as a pastor these kind of assaults on your voice are not personal, but I know it is sometimes difficult not to take them personally. But that is the first step to victory. What you have to do is not respond or react, but keep feeding the sheep. That’s the way to win. Keep preparing great messages that inspire and challenge your sheep, do not get caught up in endless discussions about this and that. Do not let someone else set the agenda – you go before God and ask the Lord what to preach and preach that. That is the way you get through this. You keep speaking truth and life and keep leading your sheep to green pastures and still waters.
When people realize that you love them, that listening to you leads to growth and victory, they will come your way. Without patronizing people in church, sometimes they are like little children. When your children are immature and silly when they were growing up, you didn’t become a tyrant, you patiently kept feeding them and they grow up and they eventually matured. It’s the same in church, you don’t disown a little child for being childish, you feed them.
Now if you see a wolf, you chase them away, you protect the sheep. But a baby lamb who is a little foolish, feed them. Keep feeding them, keep a sweet heart, don’t get caught up in foolishness yourself, and you will get to the place where you are ministering to people who love you, and more importantly they love the Word, the kingdom, and love serving and helping and walking in victory.
When I am looking for new pastors, one of the qualities and capabilities I look for is the ability to gather. When someone is a true pastor, people gather around them. It’s a part of the gifting on their life. That’s one of the reasons why I love starting potential pastors off as small-group leaders, it is easy to watch how people gather around them.
A big part of being a shepherd is stopping the church from scattering. Scattering is satan’s will for every church. That the sheep stop gathering. And satan doesn’t care if the people stop going to church for a party, out of offense, out of business, even if they stop gathering for Bible College, satan knows that when a church does not gather, the sheep are weak and they are then no match for him.
Zech. 13.7 says that if you strike the shepherd, the sheep will be scattered. Most attacks on pastors are not so much about the pastor, but as satan’s pretext to scatter the sheep and make them vulnerable. When the sheep are scattered, they are vulnerable, they get arrogant, they get foolish ideas, they go off the rails. That’s the issue. Satan is trying his hardest to get sheep separated from the flock. to stop people going to church.
Ezekiel 34.5 says that “they were scattered because there is no shepherd, and they became meat to all the beasts of the field, when they were scattered”. Think about it – they stopped going to church, they became wolf-food. This is the satanic plan that is going into play all over the world. Sheep stop going to church!
Now when the sheep stop going due to offense, due to distractions, sometimes there is nothing you can do. Some sheep will not let you pick them up and bring them back. That’s on them.
But as pastors, we have to make sure we do not act in ways that scatter the flock or allow the flock to be scattered. We need to teach clearly on the importance of regular, consistent church attendance. We need to not compromise on the need for gathering. Jeremiah 23.1 says “woe to the pastors that destroy and scatter the sheep of my pasture”. We have to make sure we are not the ones scattering!
One of the main ways we scatter is ironically by being too controlling. In the 1970s, a group of pastors of networks of churches got together and started something called the shepherding movement. I believe they did it for the best possible reasons, but they moved into a place where they became super-controlling. People could not go on holiday without the pastor’s permission, pastor’s would tell people what to wear and where to live and what jobs to take, they told people who to marry as well. This left the church very immature and it caused a great many people to quit going to church and never come back. I was part of a church in this movement and was told what colour socks to wear! It hurt my wife and I a lot, and I know some other people involved who do not go to church right now. That scattering was caused by the pastor!
The other way we can scatter is by not controlling anything. If you let anyone get up and speak there will be problems. If you never correct anyone, your church will not be a safe place. Recently one of our pastors had to correct a man who was making some women in the church uncomfortable. If he did not do that, trust me, women would start leaving the church, and some would never go to another church again. You have to be the pastor, you have to be the leader.
The key is to control what is in the church, and turn over the things outside of the church over to Jesus. You are in charge of what you are in charge of, and not in charge of what you are not in charge of.
You need to pray for wisdom to know what to control and what not to control. If someone is at home watching someone you know is a false prophet, you can try and persuade them not to, but you really have no control over that. But if they start sharing videos of that around the church, if they start putting them on the church WhatsApp group, you should control that. Your motivation should always be to hold the flock together and lead them forward.
If correcting a person in an issue involves treating them like they are four, if you are telling them what colour socks to wear and when to go on holiday, then that is infantilizing people and stopping them from growing.
Now, if I got up and said everyone in the church must wear red today, that’s controlling. That will scatter people. However, if I say everyone in the worship band must wear red today, that is about the service, you are promoting and platforming those people, and they should be compliant with dressing in a way to maximise what the service looks like. Most people should be able to appreciate the difference. If I tell someone who they can marry, I don’t have that authority. If I tell someone, if you marry an unbeliever, that’s a bad idea, and if you make that choice, you cannot preach in the church going forward or lead worship – I have that authority. Again, both of these actions are from a heart of not being the one to scatter the flock. Selah!
I have been to preach at several gatherings of scattered Christians. Conferences where most people there are Christians that do not go to church, even Bible Colleges where many people do not go to church. When I do, there is always a weakness and a lack of strength in those meetings. There is a victim mentality, a lack of strength, a lack of power, a lack of glory. The reason is they are scattered Christians as the only God sanctioned way to gather is local church. Go to a conference, of course. Go to Bible College, of course. Watch Christian TV, of course. But do any of those things at the expense of local church, and you are scattered. Pastors, remind your people of these things and teach them well.
You have ten thousand instructors in Christ, but you do not have many fathers, for in Jesus Christ I have given birth to you through the gospel. Therefore I beg you to be followers of me (1 Cor. 4.15-16)
Notice there are two different kinds of ministries in this verse: instructors and fathers. Notice there are many, many, many, many, many instructors and very few fathers. Only a father gets to tell people – follow me.
I have learned many Scriptures from many instructors, I am studying the Word all the time. But I have very few people I would call a father. As a pastor, for everyone in your church you are their instructor. but you will not be everyone’s father.
Sadly, the idea of a spiritual father has been abused so much, it is hard to talk about freely, because of the baggage it creates. We had a lady in our church, she had a spiritual father. They never spoke, but she had a certificate that he was her spiritual father, it only cost her $800. That’s insane.
But according to the Scripture above, there is a place for having a spiritual father, someone who is much more than an instructor. You listen to instructors, you follow and copy fathers. I am in actuality the father of the Tree of Life Family, but only some receive me as a father, others do not. If I am received as a father, there is a reward to that that is far greater than if people receive me as an instructor, but people are free to make that choice themselves. As a pastor you are called to be a father to the people in your church, but some will only treat you like an instructor, and that is up to them.
The problem comes when you as a pastor treat people who do not treat you as a father as your sons.
What do I mean by this? Well, there are people who were raised up in Tree of Life as a ministry. I mean without Tree of Life they would not be in ministry. Without me, they would not be in ministry. They were doing nothing when they met me, and now they are ministering and serving and are platformed and recognized. They are birthed in Tree of Life – like Paul I can say “I gave birth to you through good news”. But they do not ask me questions about ministry, they do not go to me for advice, they go to some other pastor, or some travelling preacher. They do not go to Gates of the City, they go to another conference of their own choosing. Now – like I said – that’s up to them. But if I appoint those people as pastors, or even elders, if I promote them, if I treat them as sons but they are not treating me as a father, then Tree of Life Family is going to fall apart.
You can have 10000 instructors, you can go to every conference you want, you can listen to preaching all day, and that will actually make you a better Christian. But you are called to honour your father, and if you are honouring some preacher in America that has not promoted you, loved you, given you opportunities, that does not pay your salary, that does not give you exposure, that has not birthed you, then you are going to end up very confused.
You see if someone in your church honours a travelling speaker above you – then if you promote them, maybe give them a weekly Living Church (House Group, Life Group, Bible study, whatever you call it) to run, then trust me they will end up running it the way that other minister would, not the way you would.
I don’t know my actual biological father, some of you might be in the same place. Some of you might have a stepfather or two, some of you might be adopted, but there is no one who has 10000 fathers in the natural. You can go to school and have 20 teachers, but you cannot go to a family and have 20 fathers. You need to realize this.
How can you as a pastor tell who is treating you as their father?
They listen to you when they don’t have to. They ask you about a sermon you preached three years ago, because they listened to it on the app. They drive 100 miles to see you at a conference because they love you. If they miss a Sunday, they have listened to the message before Tuesday!
They are more excited about you preaching than the guest speaker at the same conference. They are not the person who never asks you anything about ministry, then when a guest speaker comes asks them 100 questions, gets them to pray for them and then brags to you that they got them to pray for them!
They put your revelation first. They won’t be missing Sunday morning because Bible College on Saturday was just too intense. They won’t be at another church to hear some guest speaker. They won’t be giving huge offerings to other ministries and not even tithing to the local church. They will honour you.
Finally, spiritual sons defend you. It’s a wonderful thing to see and experience. But if someone comes at you, they won’t be listening to them, they won’t be trying to find out what the drama is, they just instinctively know that this is my father, and if you come at my father, you come at me.
Recently, there was a couple that came at me, and they still do regular online meetings, during which they have lied about me, mocked me, and even mocked my family. My spiritual sons from the moment that happened stopped listening to that rubbish instantly, they told me instantly, and they defended me. There are people still listen to their online services who still think I am a good instructor and love my preaching and teaching ministry. They are not my sons though, they do not see me as a father. I am just one of ten thousand to them, which is fine as long as I know that.
When Robert Maasbach, my spiritual father, was attacked and lied about by another ministry, I cut off all contact with that minister instantly. I am not playing games, I know family, and I know if I don’t honour my father, I will not live long and strong on the earth. Robert has told me that so many have not been that strong, but our relationship is on a higher level. Why will Robert build his schedule around ministering for me? Sonship. It’s a different relationship on both sides. It doesn’t have to be, and there are many teachers who I love as teachers, but the problem is when it is not on both sides!
All I can do in these situations what Paul did – point out the huge role I have played in their lives and beg them to follow me and not someone else who clearly does not love them.
Pastor, in your church right now, are many who see you as just an instructor. They would change to another church tomorrow if they thought they could find a better instructor than you. They would certainly move if they thought they could get a better deal elsewhere. They perceive church as a college or school, and if they can get better qualified elsewhere, they will go there, because their ambition in life is to get qualified and start making a name for themselves.
But there are also those who see themselves as sons, they perceive church to be family, they know that the way to build their name is to build your name, because in family, it’s the same name. They are not just learners, they are followers. Those are the people you need to concentrate on, develop and raise up as leaders. Not the people who want to pray the way teacher X said, who buy you the shirts of the preachers they want you to look like, and keep posting you the videos of the preachers they want you to sound like.
Selah!
PS. Paul also said “follow me, as I follow Christ” (1 Cor. 11.1). You should be loyal to your spiritual fathers, but that doesn’t mean you have to jump off a cliff if they do. One of my spiritual fathers when I was a new Christian, the man who taught me to cast out demons and flow in the gifts, committed sexual immorality so bad he was arrested for it. I still have fond memories and I am still grateful for what he taught me, he for a season was my father, but I am not going to follow him to jail you understand! To not have the freedom to back off when someone does something crazy is not godly. I am not talking about doing something slightly differently from how you would, in those cases, shut up and learn something, I am talking about gross sin and false doctrine.
One of the elements of pastoring that is not talked about enough is that it is a very serious and deep responsibility. You do not have the authority or right to control someone’s life, your job is not about constantly telling people off, but on the other hand if you do not get involved in people’s lives – you are not pastoring properly.
The Bible is very clear about this. It says: Obey your spiritual leaders, and do what they say. Their work is to watch over your souls, and they are accountable to God. Give them reason to do this with joy and not with sorrow. That would certainly not be for your benefit. (Hebrews 13.17 NLT)
Notice here, that the work of the pastor is to “watch over souls”. You are supposed to watch out for people and help them not make dumb mistakes, to see things coming that they didn’t see coming and help them. The Greek word for “watch” here actually literally translates as never sleeping. We as pastors need to be alert, not sleepy, we need to be attentive and aware of what is going on around us. Many pastors are living in a dream world, asleep all the time, only doing what makes sense on a logical and reasonable level. Many pastors are not even watching their flock, they are watching themselves – they preach to impress not feed, they are always looking around to be noticed, to be promoted, they are wanting to preach here and there, and it’s got nothing to do with being a pastor but being a self-promoter.
A few years ago, someone in my church in Dagenham came to me and said “can pastor such and such come and preach in our church” – it was a pastor I knew fairly well, but had no plans to invite to preach. I said “why would you mention him, does he have a revelation that especially blessed you”, and the answer was that this pastor had contacted someone in my church on social media and actually asked them if he could persuade me to get him to preach. That kind of behaviour makes my life grief not joy – as I have to then correct it, and it causes strife in the church. I am praying that pastor does not reap what he sowed by ignoring the order that God has created in the church to try and platform himself. That is sleeping.
I remember another pastor, one that I had raised up in ministry, one that I had opened many doors for, and I took him away to a conference for a few days, and I was hoping to disciple him, but he had zero respect for my wisdom and seemed bored to be with me. At one stage, we were talking and his body language was like he was going to fall asleep. Then one of the conference speakers walked past, and he jumped up, alert and ran to the conference speaker to thank him for an awesome message. I am glad he was so respectful to the guest speaker, but a pastor should be above the Uncle syndrome! That is not a pastor who is watching and noticing what is going on, and this is a pastor that will be amazed when his own church treat him like that!
How can you make yourself the best watcher there is? Let’s look at some ways.
Be an example. Make sure you are obeying your spiritual leaders. If you are a pastor as part of a family of churches, then obey the leaders of that family of churches and make it easy for them to pastor you. Do that and I guarantee the harvest of that in your church will be nothing but pleasant. I have found out that God appoints pastors in places and gives them pastors so they can sow joy into their pastors so that the people they pastor bring them joy. It’s a great deal if you notice it.
Think about things. When you read the Bible, think about it. When you are counselling people, think about the principles of the Word. When you are hearing good teaching, consider it. When you read that the Israelites spent forty years in the wilderness consider it – they were arrogant, stubborn and rebellious – they did not honour God or Moses. So think about it, do you want everyone in your church not seeing the prophetic words God has spoken to them and the next generation to enter the promised land? No – so teach on these things, share your wisdom. Part of the wisdom of the pastor is to see these things coming and teach on them.
Pray for your people. Peter did not know satan was coming for him and bringing him to a place where he falls so far, denying he was even a disciple of Christ. Jesus did though. And He spent the time not just counselling Peter, but He prayed for him! I recently spent five hours praying for someone because I can see he is about to fall. He can’t see it, but the anointing and grace (and a little experience) that I have means I can, so I pray. Sometimes you watch and pray – you see something then go to pray. Other times, you pray and watch. While you start praying for someone in your church, suddenly you get revelation and wisdom.
You are shepherd, you need to be watchful. You need to be aware of what is going on (not nosey, but just aware in the spiritual sense). It was shepherds who saw the birth of Christ first. They knew what no one else knew. Maybe that is a picture for us as pastors – we are supposed to see where God is moving on earth first.
You have to spend time with the Lord, and let Him show you what is going on in your church. Let Him show you who to counsel, who to love, who to pray for. Let Him show you as a pastor how to relate to your pastor and how to make their life a joy and how to sow that seed in a way that will bring you a harvest into your church and ministry.
I want to, as we draw near to Christmas, to challenge every pastor reading this – be like the shepherds in the Christmas story and keep watch of your flocks by night. While everyone else is going to sleep, buying the turkey, shopping like crazy, you get on your knees and pray for the people in your church, ask the Lord to show you what to preach on this month – not to impress but to bless. Ask the Lord to show you what to pray for, what to do, how to serve, so that your sheep will have the best Christmas of their lives. Ask the Lord to show you any sheep in danger like Peter was, and like Jesus pray for your Peters! This is your responsibility, and nothing takes the place of this high calling.
When the shepherds in the Christmas narrative watched their flocks by night, they encountered angels and found Jesus. I wonder how many encounters we have missed and how many times we have failed to find Jesus because we were not watching the way we should be as pastors.
In our last post, we looked at the fact that some people in your church are sheep and some are goats, and how you as a pastor can tell the difference. Often the people themselves do not know the difference! Many goats in your church think they are sheep but they are always fighting, always jumping out the fence to find something better. It’s true! They think they are correctable, but all correction must be received on their terms! That’s not correctable!.
Now, I want to let you know that some people in your church are also wolves. The easiest way to sum up the difference is sheep eat grass, goats eat rubbish, but wolves eat sheep.
David, our prototype pastor, found out that when you look after sheep, other animals will come and try and kill them. He had to chase and fight a lion, he had to chase and fight a bear. Now, I have never fought a lion in the physical realm, but I can assure you I have had to fight more than one wolf in the spiritual as they came into our church for only one reason – to attack and steal the sheep.
Oh they can wear sheep’s clothings and look amazing, and look like good little nice Christians, but they only want to stop people coming to church, to hurt people, to destroy people. I have on occasion literally thrown people out of church, in one instance while a youth pastor, I physically picked a young man up and took him outside as he was only after a young lady to seduce and corrupt and hurt.
When people see a pastor dealing with a wolf, most people are unaware the person is a wolf, and their first instinct is to look at you and presume that you are impatient, unloving, unkind, intolerant, etc etc. That’s not a nice place to be in – you rescue your sheep from a violent, nasty, spiteful, vicious animal and save them from destruction and they then turn on you for being too aggressive!
No matter what people think of you, no matter who misjudges you, listen to me pastor – do not tolerate and put up with wolf in your sheepfold. You take your sling, you take your whatever and you do not let that wolf do anything. They have come to steal, kill and destroy your church and the people in it.
Some come as a false prophet giving people false words and manipulating them. We have had people give others in the church words like “you do not need to go to church that often, God says that’s ok”, or “you do not need to tithe, God knows your heart”, or some such – that’s demonic! That is a wolf. It’s not a misguided sheep, it is a wolf. That false prophet is destroying your people and if you do not act to keep them safe, that is in you, God appointed you the shepherd and it’s your responsibility to keep the sheep safe.
Now, because we are Christians and not thugs, we confront in private. We don’t gossip, but we sometimes have to make it exceptionally clear to people: as long as you embrace this attitude and do this action you are not welcome to join our people. When you change, you meet me for coffee first and we discuss it before you come back.
When that happens, don’t expect the wolf to smile and agree. Or they may, but if they do they are lying. Expect them to text people in the church, to arrange to meet people in the church, to run the church down and keep trying to devour the people. But that’s then on the sheep, you have done what God has called you to do – keep the sheep safe.
There are several people who years ago said to me “Ben, you are being too harsh on this person” but then they are now pastors themselves, and they have come back to me and said “Now I get it”. Often the sheep will never get it, they will never understand. The sheep think a wolf in sheep’s clothing is a sheep, but you know better.
I have experienced wolves at every step of my ministry. But the good news is we have never had a church split, we have never had to deal with false doctrine, we have never been an unhealthy church – because when I see a wolf, I chase that wolf. I deal with it. I won’t let a wolf be in my congregation, and I certainly will not platform a wolf.
Several times, people have interrupted a church service to prophesy over me either judgment or a certain direction I should go. But I am a pastor, a shepherd, and I will shut that down. I stood down a pastor once for not correcting false prophets in the church because that is not keeping the sheep safe. I have had guest speakers try and find out who the richest people in the church are and try and manipulate them for money. They do not get invited back. I have had worship leaders who will not open their Bibles, will not give a penny to the church, and will not follow simple instructions and are totally unteachable. They are not platformed again.
This is how you keep the sheep safe. I now only invite travelling ministers who I know they know they are there to help me as the shepherd build the church. I cannot equip the saints by my own, but I am very selective about the other ministers I invite.
I only platform and promote people I know have my back. When an elder says “I do give, but just not to this ministry”, then it is time to ask them to go be an elder for that ministry. You are looking for a platform, not a partnership, and I am not interested. I am not looking for someone who is willing to do whatever it takes to get into ministry and make a name for themselves – remember lone wolves are nearly always wolves!
Pastor, deal with the wolves, no matter the consequences. Get out there and fight for your sheep.
Jesus says on a number of times that some people are sheep and some people are goats. Every pastor realizes this but often cannot articulate and often does not know what to do about it.
Here is what pastoring looks like when you cannot tell the difference between sheep and goats:
You feel like you fail with certain people because you didn’t meet their needs during church
You feel condemned and beat up by the people
You feel hurt by people leaving
You need to realize that not everyone in your church is a sheep person. There are some goat people. We have some people in some of our Tree of Life Churches that act like our church has a revolving door. They treat church like a restaurant. They will leave and walk right out the door and never once think to call or text you. And yes, even when you understand they are goats, it will still sting, but the worst of it is taken out.
Here is the difference – sheep eat green grass, goats eat any old rubbish. That means that if you are leading the people forward, maybe teaching a series over months, the sheep eat it up. If they have to miss a Sunday message for any reason, they have listened to it by Monday evening. They are at the conferences, they are at the Wednesday live stream. They know what you are teaching and they love it. They come to get fed, and because they are fed in the church, they love the church. So they start serving, they start investing, they start tithing, they start becoming part of the furniture. They are the people who are going with God – and it starts and is perceived with a love of what you are feeding them as the shepherd.
Goats eat any old rubbish. They are the ones that give you the CDS or post you the videos of the speakers they are always listening to. You know the ones that are talking about chem trails, or how God wants us poor and sick, or that contradict what you just taught on Sunday. Because their soul diet is rubbish, they end up thinking rubbish. Goats are easily offended, they do not plug into what you are doing, they are always looking around for more rubbish to eat. They are the spectators of the church, watching as the sheep serve, love and prepare the service for them. But even during the service, they are not hungry for the good food.
It’s goats who are telling you the worship is all wrong, it’s goats that come against what you are teaching. They think they are sheep, but they butt all the time – but this, but that. Oh, they would happily lead worship, happily preach for you. One goat told me that for years he had prayed every Sunday that I would give the mic to him! Sheep are different – sheep can be corrected, sheep can be taught.
If you want to want to know where someone is, look beyond Sunday morning. Ask them – did you watch the Wednesday live stream? No. Oh, but you have watched it since then? No! You missed Sunday, did you catch up online? No. Do you know why they are not listening – because goats think they know best. They think their way of doing Christianity is the best way.
It’s the goats that come to you and say “pastor, why doesn’t this church have a youth ministry” – “pastor, why doesn’t this church help the homeless”, “pastor, why doesn’t this church have this or that”. And if you do not personalize the church specifically to them and their needs, they will leave.
You will beat yourself up every time someone leaves unless you realize this: some people are goats. They were never with you even when they were with you. The church is there for them, but they are not there for the church. They like the benefits of the church, not the vision. They love the pen but not the grass.
Goats are not really with you, so mourning their loss is mourning what was inevitable. Selah. You cannot pastor goats because the first step of pastoring and being a good shepherd is providing good grass – and goats don’t love grass.
Part of the ministry of the pastor is to “equip the saints to do the works of ministry, till we all come in the unity of the faith, and of the knowledge of the Son of God, unto a perfect man, unto the measure of the stature of the fullness of Christ, that we henceforth be no more children…” (Ephesians 4.11-13).
Your job is to equip the saints to grow up, to be ministers, to do the works of ministry, to help people mature. But the truth is in my experience, most pastors do everything themselves. That anointing that leads them to gather people leads them to serve those people every second of every day, when trul the most loving thing to do is to equip the people to serve themselves. The Biblical model is not a one man band doing all the ministry, but rather one man equipping all to minister and creating a safe space where people can grow up and mature and become effective ministers, full equipped to doing the works of ministry.
You need to teach your church about what the Bible calls the MINISTRY OF HELPS and give people space to be put to work. Now, sometimes – and listen carefully here – the reason why some pastors do not promote others or even let them serve – is pastors can have great, big egos. I guarantee there are people in your church who are better at ushering than you, better at cleaning the church than you, better at organizing a conference than you, better at making lunch than you, better at a whole host of things. That should not threaten you, it should make you very grateful indeed. God will always send people to help in your weak areas and that is nothing to be embarrassed about. God will send you people who are strong where you are weak, and you should embrace them, equip them, and eventually employ them.
Let the people who you put in place (within reason) do the job their way and use their wisdom and grace. Let them hear God how the job should be done. Obviously they should be submissive enough to run things by you, and no one should ever usurp your authority and leadership, but don’t shove everyone on the floor just to make sure everyone knows you are the boss.
Here is the bottom line – if you do not give space for your people to serve, they will never mature, and there is seriously nothing worse in the world than a church full of immature, childish people. Have you ever been in a restaurant with a couple of children just being immature, misbehaving, screaming? Ever been stuck on a 10 hour flight with a screaming baby? Now that’s acceptable because that is not their fault, but if a Christian stays immature, that’s their fault, and as their primary feeder and leader, that can often be your fault as well.
Some pastors like their church immature because they like to be the one adult in the room, but eventually that gets boring and you need some adult company. Pastor, whatever God has called you to do, you cannot do it with a team of toddlers – so start equipping, and making space, and pushing your people to lead and serve so they can mature and eventually run departments, plant other churches, move forward and win big team battles.
Inspiring and Challenging Dreamers 