Inspiring and Challenging Dreamers

³ Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit. Rather, in humility value others above yourselves, ⁴ not looking to your own interests but each of you to the interests of the others.

Philippians 2.3-4 (NIV)

Today, I want you to learn a new word.  In the Greek it is eritheia, in the KJV it is translated strife, but here in the NIV it is translated “selfish ambition”.

It is a difficult word to translate from Greek into English.  It might be best translated “electioneering”.  You know when a politician acts in a certain way not because it is from the heart, not because it is conviction, but because it is what they think will please the crowd and they think that being a crowd-pleaser will get them promotion.

It’s more than that though, it’s also about deliberately causing fights to get the upper hand, playing people against each other, and playing games to get promoted.  It includes subtly putting other people down to make yourself look better.  Basically any behaviour you would get from a politician!

The New Covenant is absolutely and totally explicit: do nothing out of eritheia.  So many people are striving and fighting and playing games to be in control of things that they were never supposed to be in control of.  It is a symptom of a lack of trust in God.  In the New Testament days, people were even preaching out of eritheia (Php. 1.16), and both Paul and James warn strongly against it.  It is one of the works of the flesh listed in Galatians 5.

So make no mistake – it is something that is still going on today.  There are still people in churches:

• Preaching in such a way that they are trying to please the crowd and put other preachers down.
• Playing church politics by acting in certain ways to try and gain a position in the church or in the hearts of people in the church
• Not looking to the Lord for their position, not being content with their sphere of authority but fighting to maintain a position God never gave them.  In Psalm 131, the Psalmist says “I do not concern myself with great matters”.  In other words, we do not worry about things that are outside our authority.  Otherwise, we will get into the flesh and that’s not good.
• Deliberately trying to split up a church to get their pet (and probably petty) doctrine or practice to the front of the church.
• Playing party politics.  I will come to church if X preaches but not Y.  I will come if I get to do this.  I will tithe if I get to lead worship.  I will come to small group if I can share, if not I won’t.

In short, people are playing games to get power.  If you have to play games to get it, if you have to flatter people, intimidate people, put down other people, to get power – then that power is not from God and is not healthy.

James is just as explicit as Paul: For where envying and eritheia is, there is confusion and every evil work (James 3.16).  Eritheia brings confusion.  If you are confused right now, I guarantee there is selfish ambition somewhere.  If you are confused as to your destiny, selfish ambition is in there somewhere.  There is still a sense that you need to play politics and hold on to certain things to “help” God get you into your destiny.

I had a difficult decision to make this week, and I was confused, both options looked healthy.  But then I realized one option was only healthy because it helped me politically.  It would put me in a better position.  The other option was the choice that would help people, extend the kingdom of God and glorify Christ.  I repented of my selfish ambition and repented of my lack of faith that promotion comes from the Lord.  Then all confusion left and I knew what I had to do, and all I needed to do was ask for some timing and some small details.

Confusion is rooted in eritheia, so is every evil work.  If you translate every evil work from the original Greek it comes out as: every evil work.  All evil is called by our political games.  All church splits are caused by selfish ambition.  All people who fail to enter their destiny – it is caused by eritheia.  All people who backbite and pull others down – it is all caused by eritheia.

Let’s build church the way Paul built church – by louding declaring and believing and acting and believing: WE WILL DO NOTHING OUT OF SELFISH AMBITION.  WE ARE NOT POLITICIANS, WE ARE SONS OF THE LIVING GOD.

Remove not the ancient landmark, which Thy fathers have set – Proverbs 22.28

In your life you will have landmarks.  You will have already encountered some, and will no doubt encounter more.  All leaders, to be good leaders, need to recognize and highlight landmarks in their journey and in the journey of others.

One of the greatest landmarks in your life is people who have been put in place by God to lift you to another place and get you further in your dreams than every before.

In the first of the book of Daniel we find out that “the Lord gave Jehoiakim, King of Judah, into the hand of Nebuchadnezzar”.  The newspapers would have said “Nebuchadnezzar beat Judah in a big battle”, but that’s not what the Scripture said.  God put Jehoiakim in the hands of Nebuchadnezzar.

God put Nebuchadnezzar in charge of the nation, and demoted Jehoiakim. God is still God!  He will bring certain people into your life whether you want Him to do it or not!  Whether you receive from them or not is up to you, but God will bring the right people into your life.  Your job is to recognize the landmark people and welcome them and receive from them.

This is vital!  Sometimes God brings a message to us in a person who we would not welcome in the flesh – they may not be the age, or gender, or race we want them to be – but we still have to learn from them.  This is what the Bible consistently teaches.  You can actually see several times in the Scripture where people didn’t just fail to welcome their landmark people that God was bringing into their life – but they actively fought against them.

He sent his servants to the husbandmen, that they might receive the fruits of it.  And the husbandmen took his servants and beat one, and killed another, and stoned another.  Again he sent other servants more than the first, and they did unto them likewise (Matthew. 21.34-36)

This is a warning from Jesus to you – don’t reject and don’t fight the landmark people God puts in your path.  Rather honour them with all of your heart, see their entrance into your life as a supernatural event with the backing and planning of God.  Then – you benefit from them and end up having a divine appointment, not a carnal disappointment.  And as a leader, you need to teach people to recognize and honour their landmark people.

So who are these landmark people?   You have several right now, whether you recognize them or not.  Here are seven:

1. The person who led you to the Lord.  Never fail to give that person a special, special place in your life.  Your greatest treasure is your reborn spirit, and never forget the person you helped you encounter the grace and resurrection power of Jesus.  I was led to the Lord by a Glaswegian preacher named Kenny McKey, and I am blessed to have heard that message that evening.
2. The first person who opened the Bible to you.  I will never forget the legacy of George Donald who first showed me the Bible was not a dusty old textbook but a living book written by a living God.
3. The person who inspired you to enter ministry.  If there was no Eli, we would have no Samuel, no King David, no King Solomon, no Psalms, no Proverbs, no future for Israel.  Honour your Eli’s!  The truth is many, many people will discourage you from entering ministry.  They will tell you it is hard (it is), it tends to poverty (it can, especially if you are starting off or pioneering), that you won’t ever achieve anything (that’s just a lie).  They will infect you with their fear and keep you out of ministry.  The people who stand by you, encouraged and inspired you to be a minister are worthy of great admiration and honour.  I was eating pizza with my pastor in Dundee, Scotland, planning to spend the rest of my life with (boring!) computers.  He said to me you are called to ministry and encouraged me to go to Bible College.  His name was Graham McClellan and I honour him!
4. The person who is your biggest example.  Sometimes I joke I will buy a WWRMD bracelet, because Robert Maasbach has been just a great example to me and a great living, breathing picture of being an awesome pastor.  If you are a pastor, then there are vital skills in the ministry – pastoring, loving, witnessing, preaching, follow up, people skills, wisdom for all areas.  The people who are examples in these area should be honoured.  They are truly landmarks in your life.
5. The person who opened that door for you.  Barnabas took Paul and brought him to the apostles and told the apostles about how he saw the Lord in Paul’s life and ministry (it’s in Acts 9).  That’s a big door opener.  Don’t ever forget people like that.  They have changed your life.  Who laid hands on you and ordained you a pastor?  Who opened their pulpit to you?  You could not have done that yourself, and you need to honour these people, they are landmark people.   I have had a few people open a few doors for me, and I am expecting some big doors to open soon.  But always honour the door openers!
6. Your spiritual father.  Who is that?  The person who had faith in you and believed in your ministry.  When I was running one church of 20-something people (30 was a crowd), Dave Duell believed in me. He loved me just the way I was, but he put wisdom and impartation into my life many times over.  He came to us again and again, not for gain, not for personal fame, not for anything other than he believed in me.  How can you tell a father in the faith?  They don’t leave behind institutes, they leave behind sons.  We are now five churches, with plans to open at least another five (if not seven) next year.  That is sonship.  That is what happens when someone believes in you.  That is someone you must honour.
7. Your forerunner.  Unless you are totally dumb, you will not build alone, you will build on the shoulder’s of giants.  There are people who have gone before.  Preaching grace in England is hard enough – can you imagine doing it if there was no Andrew Wommack giving away free tapes and ploughing up the religious ground?  Solomon enjoyed the victories David won, and got to spend his time building not fighting.  I know I am leaving a legacy so others can build not fight, but I also know I am building some people because others fought first.  Moses outlived all the grumbling elders, quelling rebellion after rebellion, so Pastor Joshua could enter the promised land without them.  Moses, through decades of hard work taught the discontented, rebellious, childish, immature, foolish nation that they needed to believe God and believe their leader.  He was the forerunner to Joshua.  I am grateful to Andrew Wommack for being the forerunner for all of us teaching grace and ploughing hard ground so we can build

Who are your landmark people?  You need to honour them.  You could text them, phone them, write them a letter – you could also tell us on this post who some of them are and why they are important.

Next week: landmark events and how to honour them

 

In our first post in this series (which can be found here), I shared about good and bad reasons to leave a local church.  In that post, I quoted the pastor’s pastor, Bob Yandian, as saying most people leave churches offended.  From my own experience and discussions with many other church leaders that is most definitely a true statement.

Now, if you are leaving a church offended you won’t leave well.  If you are leaving a church offended you will leave for a petty reason – they didn’t play the song I liked, the pastor didn’t call me when I wanted him to, so and so didn’t say hello to me, I didn’t get promoted in the church, and so on and so forth.  And you will leave badly and hurt the church and hurt your walk with Christ. 

Next week, I will post a sort of leaving a church check list so you can leave a church in a way that honours God and honours the kingdom and reflects the character of Christ.  But you will not be interested in leaving right, indeed just reading that will annoy you, if you are offended.

Leviticus 19.18 says:

You shall not take vengeance or bear a grudge against the sons of your own people, but you shall love your neighbor as yourself: I am the Lord

Why does the Bible tell us not to take vengeance or hear a grudge?  Because it is actually fairly easy to get offended at church, at the pastor, at the elders, at our church family.

We get offended in three ways.  Firstly, we have unrealistic and ungodly expectations.  Secondly, because our pastors are human; and thirdly because our pastors do things wrong.

So firstly we get offended through unrealistic and ungodly expectations.  We have a mental image of what a pastor should be, painted in our minds by our past experiences, our culture, by preachers on the TV and many other things. 

Some people come to our church for example from a background where the pastor wears a suit every Sunday.  I don’t do that because I am reaching people to whom a suit would be a barrier to hearing me.  But their unrealistic and unbiblical expectation causes offense because I am not dressed the way they see a pastor dressing.  I have had people go out and buy me a suit because they felt sorry for me because I was a pastor without a suit.  I have a lot of suits, God is very generous to me and clothes me better than the lillies of the field, but where in the Bible is a suit mentioned for a pastor?  That’s tradition, not Bible.

We all have our traditions and our pet things and when they are challenged we can get offended.  That is a dumb reason to leave a church, especially when the challenging of those traditions helps us renew our minds and transforms our life.

When our unrealistic and unbiblical expectations are challenged we can get offended but we need to see that as a growth opportunity. 

We had a couple leave our church because I challenged an unrealistic and unbiblical tradition they had.  They said to me they knew God had spoken to them to be in our church, they knew God had called them to be with us (and we knew it too), but they couldn’t work out why God would bring them to a church where the pastor didn’t for their expectations.  They had written a list of reasons why God might have told them to come to us with about 8 or 9 reasons on, and not one of the reasons was “so I could change and grow and be transformed”.  We get offended when we hold so tightly to our traditions that the idea that God could work in a different way to our traditions is not even on the piece of paper!

We also get offended because pastors and other leaders are human.  I am not omnipresent and I am not all-knowing.  Sometimes God reveals a problem to me, but mainly you need to tell me.  When the church was growing in Acts 6, the soup kitchen it ran was only catering to Jewish widows and the Greek widows were going hungry.  Not one of the twelve apostles got a dream, a vision or impression.  No angel visited them.  The church had to tell them.  Sometimes I need to be in two places at once and someone gets offended I send a deputy!  They don’t realize pastors are human.  Sometimes I put my family above the church and people get upset… No, I am a father and husband first.  Be human, and don’t be afraid to be human, but don’t at offended because your church is led by a human. 

Jesus couldn’t do miracles when people were offended at his humanity, the fact he had a dad, and his dad had a job upset people and offended people to the point they couldn’t receive a miracle from him.  I had a mother once ban her daighter from coming to our church because I am white.  My humanity offended them to the point they missed out on miracles.  Sadly still most people go to churches where the pastor looks like them, and that will never being healthy Christianity to London.

Finally, let’s face it pastors do sin still.  I certainly do, if you don’t, let me know so I can join your prayer line!  Now there will be a point where a pastor’s integrity is damaged so badly, it would be dumb to keep getting fed by him.

There are pastors in my city who have been arrested for child abuse and yet are still in the pulpit, that’s crazy.  Yes there is grace but there is also wisdom!

On the other hand, don’t run off because a pastor is still working out his salvation with fear and trembling.  In fact, learn from their journey.  I shared last week in one of our churches one of my biggest struggles which is to believe God can actually change the United Kingdom through me.  I spend a lot of time re-reading and re-listening to a sermon series by Andrew Wommack called Don’t Limit God because that is certainly something I do.  It was not comfortable to share so honestly and starkly but afterwards so many people were encouraged and inspired and even challenged, I am very glad I did.

Don’t get offended, but if you do get offended, don’t leave the church offended.  You might still leave later for a better reason, but don’t leave offended – not for the churches’ sake, they will be surprisingly fine without you – but for your sake and for the sake of your spirituality.

https://benjaminconway.net/2013/11/20/loyalty-8-signs-of-disloyalty-5-the-backstab/

I originally posted this two years ago – it is from November 2013.  It is still just as relevant and helpful to all pastors and leaders as it was then.

If you are in a situation where you are being backstabbed, talk about it – maybe we can help.   That’s what the comment box is for.

Grace and peace,

Ben

I am not ashamed of the gospel.  I am not ashamed of the truth of the gospel.  I am not ashamed of what I do.

I’m not a success coach or life coach, though I value those people and I will bring success to your life. 

I am not a TV evangelist although I am on TV and believe we need many more people who understand grace and faith on TV, and I will be expanding our TV ministry.

I am not a hireling.  You won’t see me flutter off to the US because the money is better there or the moral standard for preachers is more lax there.  Though I love America with all my heart.

I am not a compromiser.  You won’t see me living on a different continent to my wife for decades claiming it is God’s will.  Nor will I take out a super injunction against my wife to hide a life of deceit.  My first wife is my last wife, for better or worse. 

I am not interested in the obsessions of the charismatic media.  I will not get a guest speaker just because they are cool or will drag a crowd.a long, but I only invite people to the Tree who I genuinely believe will inspire and challenge you.

I’m not interested in the latest Christian worship song, I am interested in the songs that build you up and encourage you. 

Our services are not rock concerts and they are not seeker friendly, that are Spirit led and crafted to set you free.

Tree of Life is not a concert, not a performance, not a show, not an attempt to be cool.  It is a church, an assembly of believers gathered in love for love.

I am not a motivational speaker, though I will motivate you.  I am not a star or celebrity, and I won’t let you call me Pastor like a title.

I am an apostle.  I am a pastor.  It isn’t my title, it is my job.  I am here to equip you to minister, to set you free from captivity, to inspire you to dream big and to challenge you to live the dream.

I am going to plant a network of churches over Europe so no one has to drive more than one-hour to reach a Tree of Life Church.  I am going to disciple a million people in the UK and help them be the best Christian they ever could be, beyond all they can ask or imagine.  I am going to train and raise up a thousand pastors who fear no one but God, hate nothing but sin and who dream huge dreams.

I will pastor Tree of Life Dagenham and it will be a model church for all of Europe, we will build a headquarters in Dagenham that will be training and loving people all over the world.   Our preaching and music will cover the globe.  Already there isn’t a moment where someone isn’t listening to me preach somewhere in the world.  The music ministry and song writing of our church is already sublime, but you haven’t seen nothing yet.

We will get a building in Dagenham that is ours 24-7 where we will pastor London, teach Europe and reach the world.

We will be a church full of the Word, full of the Spirit, full of the nations and full of love.  You can choose to be part of it, or you can sit on the sidelines and throw stones, either way it will happen.

One of the Scriptures you won’t find in a memory box or on a fridge magnet is:

Make it your goal to live a quiet life, minding your own business and working with your hands, just as we instructed you before.

1 Thess. 4.11

Yet one of the most important things we can do as Christians is mind our own business.  We have a lot of people in many churches who are not so much busy but busybodies.  Poking their nose where it doesn’t belong and causing mischief. 

It generally leads to manipulation and bullying.  The fruit of the spirit isn’t other control, it’s self control!  We are not called to workout everyone else’s salvation, but to work out our salvation.

As a pastor one of the areas in which you need great wisdom is in knowing what is your business and what is not.  If it is your business, then get involved and do what needs to be done.  If it is not your business, shut your mouth.

Here are three clues to what is your business and what is not:

1. What you originate is your business.  The children that you originate you should be raising!  How other children are raised is not your business.  The churches you plant you can rule over, the ones you didn’t you can’t. 

What is happening in the church down the road is none of your business – don’t preach on it in the pulpit, don’t comment on it.  If you are asked point out you don’t pastor there. 

Train your department heads to take care of their departments and not try and run other departments.  Train your elders to disciple their people and not get involved in other small groups.  Train people to not get offended that you do not gossip over what is none of their business.

2. What you pay for you are responsible for.  I once was holding some healing meetings and a man came who wanted to pray for people.  I didn’t let him and he got very angry and upset at me, even cursing me and praying for me to get sick.  I told him when he hires the hall then he can pray for who he wants.  If you are the one paying the bills then you are in charge.

A caveat is that when people give to a church they are not paying they are giving.  Being a big giver does not give you the right to run the church, offering time isn’t a bill you pay it is a seed you sow.  If you don’t die to your gift when you give it and think it is a way to run the church you will never have a harvest on it.

If you are not paying the bills, it is not your baby, it is not your business – get your nose out and mind your own business!

3. What you are faithful to is your business.  I used to be in a church with an AGM where you could vote on who would run the church.  The problem was people turned up at that meeting who never attended the church, never served, never cleaned, never helped with children’s ministry, never given a penny.  But they voted on what the church would do.

Thankfully the pastor there had the sense to change that situation, but many people were offended and upset because they liked getting involved in business that they didn’t have to be faithful to.

No, what you are faithful to is your domain.

Take the time to work out what your business is and mind it.  And if it’s not your business, don’t mind.  And train your people in the same way.

5.  Pastors have to be thorough in their teaching, realizing there are ditches on both sides of the road and we need to help people steer a course forward.

4.  Celebrate the victories and gifts of other people.  You need each other.

3.  It is up to pastors to teach people the purpose of government.

2.  The Holy Spirit is God’s gift to us to change the world.  The supreme purpose of the baptism of the Holy Spirit is to bring people from death to life.

1.  A little generosity to someone in a strange land means a great deal.

I am actually blogging from inside a plane.  The plane has its own wifi!  I have headphones in and I’m watching X-Men, Amanda is sitting next to me and watching a period drama.  In under four hours we will be in Chicago to catch our connection to Denver. It’s been a remarkably pleasant flight with no turbulence or issues. 

As I am sitting here, I am thinking about the whole aeroplane experience, having been on a few this year and intending to fly at least twice more before 2015.  As someone who is used to making my own decisions, plot my own course and generally get my own way, flying is a very different experience.  You sit where you are told, you wait until they are ready to fly, you eat what you are given, and you don’t get a vote on destination once airborne. 

Why would any adult subject themselves to this treatment?  Why would they subject themselves so willingly to another person, and pay a lot of money to do so?  The answer is remarkably simple: the pilot of the aeroplane has a set of skills that means only he can get me where I need to be.  I can’t do it myself I need him to take me.  As long as I need him to get to where I need to be, I have to listen carefully to him, and give up my individual freedom to be part of something bigger than myself to access the pilots skill and wisdom because I have a destination.

The application to us as leaders is huge.  Firstly, to get people to follow you you must have a destination, you must have a place they want, even need to go to.  Right now I follow the workout and eating advice of someone  because I want to get to a certain place health wise.  I have three mentors whose advice on church leadership and planting I follow because I need to get somewhere.  People follow me because I am leading them to a great destination.  Secondly, if you have wisdom to get somewhere don’t ever let your vision be a democracy.  A lot of people join someone because of a need to get somewhere but on the journey, selfishness, impatience, frustration and pride kick in and, although ignorant, start insisting things be done a certain way.  Don’t let people sew their cotton patches into your silk vision.  If you have spent years training to be the pilot, and you know you can do it through your experience and your passion, don’t hand the joystick over to anyone else.

Finally, if you do want to be better than you are, if you want to go further than you have ever gone, reach destinations you never could on your own, you will have to learn to develop the character to be part of something bigger than yourself and learn to shut up and listen to the pilot.  In an age where people want their democratic rights, where people think the church should be run by committee, where schools give votes to children and politicians put popularity over principles, learn to develop the necessary character to remain somewhere, to be a small part of a big wheel, to lay down your opinions to get to where you need to be.  If you find a good pilot, board, sit down, listen well and don’t jump out until you have completed the journey.

Yoda is over nine hundred years old and was the ruler of an ancient group of Jedi.  An accomplished fighter and leader, he has a great deal of wisdom.  Here is some of the things I have learned from this little green dude:

1.  Don’t attempt something – do it

To achieve anything in life you have to already see that you can do it.  Those who think they can and those who think they cannot are both right.  Decide in your heart that you can succeed, and don’t try to do it, just do it!

2.  Don’t be afraid to change games!

We used to live on a hill, and my little brother could get some amazing speed on his little tricycle.  He used to race the cars going past.  He never ever beat one, no matter how fast his legs would pedal.  His problem wasn’t pedalling harder – it was he needed a better vehicle.

So many people are pedalling as hard as they can when they need a new approach, a new job, a new relationship, a new location, a new strategy.  It’s not about working hard, it’s about getting the job done!

3. Stop worrying about what might happen!

In John 14, while talking about the importance of faith, Jesus suddenly tells his disciples he has a place prepared for them in heaven.  That used to amaze me until I realized that a heavenly mind is the best environment for faith because it destroys all fear.  You have six months to live from cancer?  That means I will be with Jesus in six months!  You are going to live under a bridge?  Well after a billion years living in a mansion I don’t think I care.

Realizing that it will all work out in heaven causes you to let go of the worries and concerns of earthly things, let’s you rejoice and let’s you believe God without fear contaminating that faith.

4. Fear is the root of all evil

God has not given you or me a spirit of fear and we must resist fear with every breath in our body.  Jesus told Jairus four simple words “No fear, only believe”.  We need to adopt the same mantra no matter what happens in our life.  Fear only empowers the devil, faith only releases the power of God.  Resist fear!

5. Unlearning is as important as learning – and find a quiet space!

We have a lot of nonsense in our minds.  Religion, tradition and culture have taught us a lot of things.  To change a baby’s nappy, the first step is to get rid of the old nappy and clean up the stinky stuff.  To change your thinking, the first step is to get rid of the old thoughts and clean up the stinky stuff between your ears!

To truly do this, you need to find a place of stillness.  A place where you can rest and be silent.  A place where you can take the time to dream, to think, to ponder, to think, to unthink, to rethink.  Angry people do not make good decisions!  Find a place of calm and spend time there.

True leadership involves doing and modelling what you expect others to do.  Too many leaders – and sadly this includes church pastors – do not get involved with what they want people to do.  They don’t witness, don’t pray, only study the Word to prepare a sermon and so on and so forth.  Some don’t even turn up for their own church services until it’s time for the preaching.

Get out of it!  Get your hands dirty, get involved, visit someone, pray for someone, share the gospel with someone.  You will get more respect from your people and have more fun too!