Inspiring and Challenging Dreamers

It’s a bit of a long winded title this evening, but I can’t think of a pithy way of saying this: a lot of pastors are jealous of other pastors.  They struggle with jealous and envy towards other pastors they perceive to be more successful than themselves.  Then other pastors struggle because people that they want to befriend are jealous of them and will not befriend them.

I know that it is a strange way for those of us called into ministry to act, but it happens and it has happened for a long time.  As far back as the times of King David it happened.

It happened as they were coming, when David returned from killing the Philistine, that the women came out of all the cities of Israel, singing and dancing, to meet King Saul, with tambourines, with joy and with musical instruments. The women sang as they played, and said, “Saul has slain his thousands, And David his ten thousands.”Then Saul became very angry, for this saying displeased him; and he said, “They have ascribed to David ten thousands, but to me they have ascribed thousands. Now what more can he have but the kingdom?”  (1 Samuel 18.6-8)

David had raw passion, faith, a confidence in the Lord and it got great results.  Saul had a position of leadership but had grown hard to the things of God through the ministry – it happens today too!

When Saul first met David he told him he was just a boy.  Then Saul offered his armour to David.  Not out of love or mercy, certainly not out of any conviction that David might actually defeat Goliath.  So why did Saul do it?

I think it was to patronize David, to make him look stupid.  To put a young teenager in the armour of a man head and shoulders taller than your average man is going to make him look more stupid than Mickey Mouse in the Sorceror’s Apprentice or a toddler wearing daddy’s slippers.  Ambitious, jealous leaders don’t try and raise up the young men and women of faith in their care, they try and embarrass them and condemn them.

There is David wearing armour ridiculously too big for him, Saul and his courtesans laughing their heads off, teasing the young man for his faith and drive.  David would be walking around like Robocop, taking a minute or two to turn his head and move in the heavy armour.

Saul wasn’t trying to help David – we know his character well enough to know that.  He was trying to make him look stupid and kill his faith.

Jealousy makes you do that.  Envy makes you attack what you need to help you.  When the courage of another exposes that you are a coward, you want to snuff out that light of courage and keep the world in the dark about your fear.

There is a lot of deep truth in this encounter between God’s anointed and the ex-anointed.  But what is obvious and surface is important too: older ministers are threatened by younger ministers, the passionate threaten the passive, the courageous threaten the cowards, the dreamers threaten the daydreamers.

And it hasn’t changed.  Today in the church there are leaders who are not secure in their position, who have lost their passion and they are threatened by the Davids.  Their passion makes them embarrassed, their confidence makes them uneasy, their willingness to go kick Goliath where it hurts makes them feel old and ashamed.

I have seen jealousy kill people the same way it killed Saul.  As soon as David’s song was louder than Saul’s, Saul wanted to kill the young man.

Jealousy will stop you from hearing from heaven.  Jealousy will stop you enjoying your ministry.

So, today I want to give you a couple of practical lessons.  Things that I needed to know and wish you had taught me but I learned the hard way and now I am teaching you!

Firstly, don’t ever let the jealous talk you out of killing your Goliath.  This isn’t a battle to go for, it’s a battle to ignore.  Don’t waste your time fighting Saul, move on and kill Goliath.  Don’t waste your time arguing with other ministers.  Get on and change the world.  Don’t waste your time trying on the armour and being the source of their jokes.  Get on and change the world.  Don’t waste your time trying to prove yourself to people whose day is over.  Get on and change the world.  Stop wasting time to get these people on side.  Go and change the world.

You might be the one trying to change the world and you have already encountered Saul.  Some jealous person attacking your dream, throwing you in a pit, bullying you because they know you might one day exceed them or show them up.  Don’t be tempted to live for them and try and prove yourself to them – don’t do it – go and change the world!

Don’t lower yourself to their level to stop them being jealous of you.  I’ve been a school teacher for a number of years, and I saw many children stoop intellectually to avoid being bullied by the jealous.  I’ve seen people do drugs or lose their virginity and suddenly want everyone to do the same and make the same mistakes.  People without passion for God and character want you to lose yours.  Don’t give up on your big dreams because of the jealous!

Instead find people who dream big like you and want to change the world like you.  That’s what I have done, I have given up on pastors who want me to dream like them, who want me to dot my i’s and cross my t’s before stepping out and obeying God and who want me to box in God and His plan the same way they do.  I am surrounding myself with the fellowship of the improbable dreamers, the imagineers of the impossible and the hopers of far-flung hopes.  Get around people like that!

Don’t lower yourself to be the same, raise yourself to be different.  Don’t try and fit in, you were designed to stand out!

If people are jealous of your success, keep doing what you are doing.  If people are jealous of your talent, get trained and get more talented.  If people are jealous of your church, love and build your church.  If people are jealous of how much you love the Lord, tell them the truth: I will become more undignified than this.

Dream big, dream out loud, and don’t let the small voices stop your big dreams.

I am preparing for Sunday this morning, writing a church bulletin, reviewing my sermon, making sure people are in place to do what needs to be done.  And I thought this preview from this Sunday morning’s message might really help some people:

You see, New Year’s Resolutions don’t work.  You know it and I know it.  Yet year after year we make the same resolutions, the same promises, deep down knowing that by mid-January we will have broken them in spades, and extinguish even that glimmer of hope that maybe, just maybe this year will be different.  We have to get off that roller-coaster folks, it’s not good for you!

The problem is this: most people live their life on the basis of will-power.    You will see it in the next few weeks across the country.  Those of you who go to the gym, suddenly your gym is crowded.  Don’t worry by February they will be empty again.  Some people will come back to church in January telling me “I will be here forever now, pastor”, “I will never miss church again”, “I will be on time for every service”.  By February they will be back to their 1 week in 3 or 4, turning up nonchalantly at the end of the worship wondering why nothing is working in their life.

So we know these resolutions do not work.  So what do we do?  We stop making resolutions, and we instead set GOALS.  This New Year’s Eve we are not making resolutions for 2016, we are setting goals.

Now let’s reason together – let’s use our brains and grasp how and why this works.  A resolution is a resolve to do A, B, or C, and not do X, Y, and Z.  It is based on willpower.  Willpower is your ability to muster strength from your soul – your thinking, the information you have and your feelings.  The problem is your soul is not redeemed yet – you know it and I know it – and it has feelings, whims and wild ideas.

Let’s talk about dieting.  The most common New Year’s Resolution is to lose weight.  Now you all know how to lose weight – some ways are better than others, but you all know that stuffing your face with doughnuts is bad, and eating your greens is good.  It’s not an information problem.  So you make a resolution: you resolve to stop eating cake.

So day 1 you fight the temptation to eat badly all day, and all day you think about what?  Cake!  The house is still full of goodies from Christmas.  There is still Christmas Pudding in the house.  It’s not so bad the fight, you are stuffed full from Christmas and the belt is already tighter, so you manage day one.  You eat the good stuff.

Day 2 is just day 1 again, but harder.  Your resolve causes you to focus on the forbidden.  Remember the Bible teaches the strength of sin in the law.  In other words, people don’t want to do wrong until we start telling them not to.  No one walks around touching the walls, but if you put up a sign that says “Wet Paint, Don’t Touch” there is something in us that wants to touch.  The same is true for ourselves: if we set a law to ourselves – I will not eat cake.  Then something inside you rises up and wants to do it.  When you think “Do not eat cake”, you are thinking about cake.  It’s that simple.  You are setting yourself up to fail because you are programming your brain badly.

Day 4 you have a tough day.  The kids really need to be back at school, and parenting is tough, you are tired, going stir crazy, you have started back at work and it’s hard catching up and getting in the swing again.  And all day  you are telling yourself “Do not eat cake” – you have cake on your mind!  You are starving, so you eat the Christmas pudding.  Just a little.  And a little more.  And some cream.  And some more pudding.

And now less than one hundred hours after you made your resolution, you are lying on the sofa, stuffed full of pudding – but you are also full of regret, recrimination and shame!  Your resolve is gone, so your resolution is over.

I think if you want to make some money you should open a gym called Resolutions.  It is a gym the first two weeks of January, and then it become a pub for the rest of the year.  We all know this is how things play out, but each year we play the same gain.

What can we do?  How can we make choices that have longevity?  By not making them resolutions and not making them from our willpower.

Instead, make choices on the basis of priorities.  And you get your priorities right by setting goals.  If you are on resolution mode, you are only thinking about the “don’t” all the time.  You are being negative and are attracting failure.  Thinking “I must not eat cake, I must not eat cake” only attracts cake into your life and will inevitably end up with you eating cake.  But if you are on GOAL MODE – we step away from all those negative thoughts and we look at what the GOAL IS.

So if you want to lose weight – don’t make a resolution.  Don’t resolve to do anything!  Set a GOAL instead.  Tell yourself I am going to weigh X stone and Y pounds, or better still get yourself a size goal – I will fit into these trousers, that dress.

Now take the goal and put it on your dream wall.  What does Habukkuk tell us: write the vision down and make it plain.  I would (and have done) buy the trousers.  I started this year with a 48″ waist, and now it is a 40″ waist.  I assure you there are 38″ trousers (and 36″ and 34″) in the house.  I will do it!

Now meditate on the goal.  Reflect on the goal.  Imagine the end result. Dream it, imagine it, visualise it.  This is what the Bible calls “hope”.  Now here is the good news – you are not even thinking about cake, you are focussing on the goal.

Your goal sets your priorities.  The more you focus on the goal, the more your priorities naturally shift.  You stop caring about the cake (the cigarette, the ex-girlfriend who is not good for you, the spending too much on shoes, the whatever) and you start caring about the goal.  What you meditate on is where you will end up.  As a man thinks in his heart, so he is (Proverbs 23.7, made famous by Napolean Hill, but penned by Solomon!).  You have to let the goals lead, not the resolutions.  The resolutions will lead you back into trouble, the goals will lead you forward to victory.  Your resolve will fail.  WE ARE NOT THAT GOOD TO BE RESOLUTE – we have to take our mind off that and PUT IT ON THE GOAL.

WE ARE NOT LOOKING TO BE A FLASH IN THE PAN – WE ARE LOOKING AT A LONG TERM SUCCESS, as individuals and as a church!  SO, MAKE GOALS NOT RESOLUTIONS!

With a resolution, when you fail, it’s all over.  But with a goal, it’s awesome, a long range goal supersedes short term failures.  The goal enables you to get back up again and keep walking forward.

Ok, so accusations are powerful.  They hurt, they cause trouble, they can de-rail your entire ministry.  So what do you as a leader and pastor do about them?

1. Pray!
   1. Praying for someone to experience the blessings of Christ is the exact opposite to accusing.  Pray for who?  Those who persecute you!
   2. Pray for all the people who accuse you, not that their teeth will be smashed in their mouth but that they will experience God’s richest blessings.
   3. It’s the counter-spirit to accusations, it’s the spirit of Christ!
2. Bring it to the Light!
   1. Accusers like to work in the dark.  They are sneaky, spreading gossip and lies.  They work backward and sideways.
   2. So bring it to the light.  Go to the person “I heard you say I am not this, not that, that I do this”.  Bring it to the light, it soon stops it!
3. Preach!
   1. That’s right – get in the pulpit and explain to people how evil accusing is.  Deal with the accusations from the pulpit – in the light.
   2. If they accuse you of not fasting on the right days, preach on new wineskins.
   3. If they accuse you being just a carpenter, teach on where a prophet is accepted.
   4. If they accuse you of eating with sinners, teach them what the mission of the church should be!

What are the different ways in which the devil uses people to accuse you.  Some are blindingly obvious – like a direct allegation, others are a lot more subtle and you may not even realize that they are an accusation.

Here are seven ways in which the devil manipulates people to accuse you:

1. A Direct Allegation
   1. This is the kind of accusation we all recognize as accusation.  Someone makes a statement against you: you are arrogant, you are rude, you are a gambler
2. A Criticism
   1. Criticism is basically expressing your opinion about someone’s work or abilities or qualities.  It is a statement expressing disapproval, and is generally a form of accusation.
   2. Don’t go around looking for bad qualities to point out.  It is accusing.  You are working for the devil.
   3. Pray for people, don’t accuse them!
3. Grumbling
   1. Grumbling is not making a direct allegation, but making undertones that everyone else will hear.  It is a form of accusation.  It is the devil’s work.
   2. No wonder Scripture says “Do everything without grumbling!”
4. Accusation by Absence
   1. The absence of certain people is a message.  By boycotting a meeting, you send a louder message than if you actually come in person!
5. Sarcasm
   1. Sarcasm is using the words that are the opposite of what you mean, to be unpleasant to someone.
   2. With sarcasm, you can make “please” and “thank you” sound like “I hate you!”
   3. It can easily become a form of accusation to someone.
6. Insinuation
   1. An insinuation is an indirect allegation.  It is still accusing.  In fact often it can be more powerful than a direct allegation.
7. Gaslighting
   1. Gaslighting is when you re-tell a story but you put everything in a different light.  You highlight some things and you ignore other things, and tell a different story.
   2. That’s what they did to Jesus, they re-told his stories to make him look like someone who wants to destroy the temple.
   3. Be very careful around people who re-tell events to make things dark.

In our last post, we discussed the fact that the devil is the accuser of the brethren and his plan is to accuse you through people close to you.  We analysed what accusations are like and why they happen.

Now I want to look at the kind of people who might accuse you.  Satan would rather talk to you one-to-one but you are too smart to listen to him tell you that you are rubbish and useless.  He needs megaphones on the planet – people who voice his accusations out loud.  Accusations work, and satan relies on them, and he is the master of finding the right kind of people to accuse and attack you and distract you from kingdom work.

Now listen to me – never become the devil’s staff.  Never become satan’s employee.  Never accept the job offer from Lucifer!  That is not the way God does things – through accusations.  He never moves or leads through accusing.  He is never behind accusing!

As soon as you accuse someone, you have let satan have a rest and you are his employee on planet earth.  You are literally doing the work of the devil!

Michael, the archangel, dare not accuse satan – but you happily accuse your wife, your husband, your friends, your elders and your pastor.  Can the evil in your wife be compared to satan?  Then why accuse.  Pray, love, forgive, care!

Accusing never changes anyone.  It just kills relationships.  Don’t do the work of accusing people.  It’s not your job, it’s the devils.  There is no Biblical ministry of criticism, finger-pointing, and running people down!

So what kind of people accept job offers from the devil?  These are the seven people most likely to accept a job offer from the devil.

1. Bitter People
   1. We all suffer in life – we all go through pain.  But some people let that hurt and pain define them, they stop trusting people, they become cynical, they become accusers of everyone.
   2. Bitter people are the hardest to lead and the quickest to become accusers.  That is why you must always resist the root of bitterness.
2. Jealous People
   1. People who are insecure in their positions and role in life are aggressive.  They attack anyone near them like a rabid dog.
   2. Jealous pastors attack all their staff.  Jealous husbands and wives attack each other and accuse their spouses of being interested in other people.  Jealous church members will accuse the pastor.  Jealous bosses spy on their workers because they are deep down accusing them of planning their downfall.
   3. The Pharisees were jealous of Jesus due to his popularity.  That lead to their becoming his accusers.
3. Small Minded People
   1. People who cannot see your vision accuse you.  People whose tiny minds cannot embrace the vastness of your plans will accuse you.
   2. The man who only had one talent buried his talent.  He had no idea how big his master’s vision for multiplication was, and accused his master of being harsh.
   3. I have seen many people like this: they accuse you of being harsh because they don’t know the destination.  These people tend to be critical of all who are around them.  The fear in their small minds expresses itself in accusing.
4. Ungrateful People
   1. It is a tiny step between ingratitude and accusing.
   2. If you don’t realize what you owe someone, then you will end up accusing them.
   3. The Israelites accused Moses of trying to murder them.  They had no idea how much they owed him for leading them out of Egypt.
   4. Accusers are ungrateful people.  They don’t realize how good God is to them.  They pick up stones to hurl at the man who healed them.
5. People With Something to Hide
   1. Many times people defend their sinful behaviour with a good offensive on someone else.
   2. They strike first on you, they have a lot to hide.
   3. Ahab accused Elijah of bringing trouble to Israel, when it was Ahab’s lack of backbone that caused all of Israel’s problems
6. Backstabbers
   1. When someone stabs you in the back or does something disloyal to you, they often need to justify themselves for their bad action.
   2. If a person in leadership in a church starts a new church across the road, to justify their behaviour they often accuse the pastor of the old church.
   3. Disloyal people are the elite troopers of accusing.  They are satan’s dream team!
7. Evil people
   1. To quote Alfred in the Batman movies, some people just want to see the world burn.
   2. When someone accuses you of something bizarre, their mind has to have conceived that bizarre thing.  You have to consider why – maybe it is something they have done!
   3. Remember it was Judas who accused Jesus of not caring for the poor.
   4. People who can always accuse quickly and spot evil all the time – they are evil people.

The devil is called the accuser of the brethren.  That sums him up perfectly, always accusing.  And if he can’t do it directly, he will inspire other people to accuse you.  I have been accused with the best of them, but recently I have been asking this question: why does the devil accuse?  Why do that?  What is the point?

The point is that accusation paralyses the kingdom.  It makes ministers give up, lay down, quit, fall apart, lose focus and play into the accuser’s hands.  The more you listen to the accuser, the more control he can exert in your life.  All of us are vulnerable to guilt and fear, and accusations take both those emotions and use them to stop us fulfilling our destiny!

The devil accuses basically because it works.  But it doesn’t have to work – we can overcome the accuser.  We can walk above accusation, but to do that we have to grasp how it works:

1. Accusations destroy healthy relationships
   1. An accusation is like poison to a good relationship.  Great healthy divine relationships can be destroyed by accusations.  Things will never be the same if an accusation is embraced by someone.
   2. If you accuse someone in your church of fancying another person in the church, I guarantee their relationship will never be the same again.  That is the power of accusation!
   3. Everything that is pure is looked at in the light of the accusation and it looks muddy and murky.
2. The power of an accusation is that it is the polar opposite of God’s plan and view
   1. Satan’s plan is to get someone to accuse you of the opposite of what you are.  Some of the most generous, large-hearted people I know are accused regularly of being money obsessed.  People who would never steal are accused of being thieves.  You would think that if you accuse someone of something they would never do – the polar opposite of their character – it wouldn’t work, but it does, it really does.
   2. Moses was accused of being proud and he was the most humble man on the planet.
   3. Jesus was accused of being the destroyer of God’s house!  Come on now!
3. Satan’s plan is to get those closest to you to accuse you
   1. If you are a pastor, satan would rather a church goer to your church would accuse you than someone who doesn’t go.
   2. He would rather have a deacon or elder accuse you than a church goer
   3. He would rather have an associate accuse you than a deacon or elder.
   4. He would rather have your wife accuse you than an associate.
   5. Jesus was accused by Judas, his close friend.
   6. Be aware, if you are placed in a position of honour by someone, satan’s plan is to try and con you into being their accuser and his mouthpiece on the planet
4. Accusations don’t kill your ministry – your reaction to them might!
   1. If you just keep doing what God told you to do, and are Spirit-led not accuser led then you will be fine, no matter what they say about you!
   2. If you listen to the accusers and it intimidates you or it gets under your skin and you react like Moses and smash the rock you should be talking to, then you will fail to enter your promised land!
5. Accusers are mad!
   1. Luke 6 says that the Pharisees watch Jesus to find a time to accuse him because they were filled with madness (read verses 7 through to 11).
   2. Accusers get so full of hatred and rage and fear that they go mental.  Their behaviour is literally that of a crazy person.
   3. You have to keep your heart pure – when you are accusing people, the devil is absolutely using you to rip people apart and you will be subject to the rage and hate eventually.   To the point of madness!
   4. Jesus’ accusers ended up coming at him with swords and staffs and nailed him to a cross.  That is not normal behaviour for priests.  Accusing drove them to it!
6. Your accuser loves religion and quotes that have nothing to do with the Word of God
   1. They will accuse you because a certain psychologist says you are cult-like or a certain scholar claims you are wrong.  They won’t use the Bible because it is the truth!
   2.  There are women accusing their husbands and all men quoting feminists and secular worldly scholars.  All their statements sound reasonable but are not Biblical.
   3. Do not let the accuser in, even if he dresses up as respectable scholarly wisdom!
7. When your accuser is shown to be wrong, it won’t stop him.  He will just make up more stuff!
   1. The process is like this: the accuser makes a false accusation, it obviously is false, people see it to be false, and the accuser then gets desperate and makes even more bizarre accusations
   2. When they accuse Jesus of hating the temple, there is no proof, so the soldiers blindfold him and punch him in the face telling him to prophecy who hit him.  That’s how desperate they were to prove he was a false prophet!
   3. Your accusers will say some crazy things!
8. Anyone who ties themselves to you inherits your accusers too
   1. Accusations will very soon cover those who are associated to you!
   2. If you don’t want to be accused of what a pastor is accused of, don’t become his associate!
   3. Don’t expect to join the team and be the guy who isn’t accused!  It won’t happen.  You are not greater than Jesus!
   4. The more the accusations come to you, the closer you are to the leader.  If you are accused of destroying the temple, you are close to Christ indeed!
   5. Peter was accused of being Christ’s guy!  He couldn’t handle it, sometimes people can’t handle being accused of being in your gang.  Perhaps you wouldn’t last a day being accused the way your pastor is.  Have a little respect – you don’t know what someone is going through to get the Word to you.
9. Some accusations can change your whole life direction if you let them
   1. There are some accusations which push your buttons.  Satan will try and find out what those buttons are and press them!
   2. Accusations can make the best of leaders change course if they are not careful.
   3. I have seen pastors stop receiving funds and challenging their congregation to give because they are scared of being accused of loving money.  I have seen pastors stop ministering life to certain people because of accusations of favouritism or even adultery.
10. Accusation is a spiritual attack – it’s not about what you are being accused of, it’s to stop you doing God’s will!
    1. You get accused and you change behaviour, guess what – new accusations will come.
    2. People want to make you feel shame.  The devil is behind that.  Don’t listen and let it drive you, be Spirit-led.
    3. Satan wants to stop you advancing the kingdom!
    4. Nothing you do will change the accuser, they are the ones with the problem, not you.  So don’t change for an accuser.

Accusations are there because the devil wants to degrade you.  He wants to disgrace you.  He wants you to miss the mark and drive you to hating the accusers.

There is only one place where we find Jesus cannot do miracles, and that is his home town.  Why?  Because the people were over familiar with him – they saw him as the carpenter’s boy, not as the son of God.

One of the things that will outright stop the flow of the power of God in your life is being too familiar with the people God is using to minister life to you and equip you to minister.

Now I don’t believe there is anything wrong with being familiar with people who are pastors and evangelists.  I love spending time with my people and all good pastors do too.  The travelling speakers who fly in and fly out and don’t linger around people – I just ain’t interested in them at all.

Familiarity is not being familiar – familiarity is knowing someone so well that you lose your admiration and respect for them.  You become presumptuous around them and stop respecting them.  This familiarity is what made Michal barren, and it still makes Christians barren today.

No matter how great the gift from God is, the power on the person is always destroyed by familiarity.  Jesus was the greatest healing minister who had ever preached in Nazareth, but their familiarity caused them to see only a few little miracles (Mark 6.5-6).  They knew his mum and dad, they knew him as a child – their familiarity and lack of respect and honour lost them their miracle night.

Your family may suffer from familiarity – how can you be the great healer when you are a this-and-that.  Wives, like Michal, can be unimpressed with their husbands at the exact moment everyone else is impressed with them.  They will say “Well, I know what you are really like”, “I am not like your lackeys in the church/ office/ factory”, “if only people knew what you are really like”.  I have seen ministers go through this.  The wife is probably right, but their familiarity will cause them to be barren.

Close friends also suffer from familiarity – familiarity created Judas.  Familiarity causes people to cross lines they should not cross!  It makes people say things they should never say.

When Michal spoke against David, she became a critic of the king.  David had just built a tabernacle but she wasn’t impressed.  God said David was a man after his own heart, but she hated him.  Can you imagine being annoyed when God is pleased?  Familiarity will bring you there.

It takes discipline and care not to become familiar, and if you are a leader, it takes discipline and care not to let people become familiar.  Remember – familiarity is being so familiar with someone it causes you to lose your respect.  Remember – familiarity is what causes you to lose your access to the power of God that should be setting you free and equipping you to walk in your dreams.

Here are some tell-tale signs that familiarity is happening:

• Sitting at the back of the church
  • If you are too familiar with the pastor, his preaching won’t set you on fire anymore!  When a pastor goes across the world, people travel to hear him, but those who are called to be in his church skip church, won’t bother crossing the road to get there, and then sit at the back nonchalantly.
• Not buying or getting hold of product
  • Someone who listens to a lot of someone preach online or on CD becomes familiar.  Be careful if that then stops!  If you have stopped getting hold of your pastor and listening to him online, you may be becoming too familiar!
• Not reading your pastors’s books
• Discussing the background of your pastor
  • Every man of God is a man.  That needs to be said!  He doesn’t have a perfect life, he has a family, he has an imperfect marriage, imperfect children, and has the same challenges you do.  You can pick any aspect of any leader’s life and then become so familiar you destroy the power of God from coming into your life.  It’s that simple and that true!  Be careful!
• Fault-finding and magnifying
  • When a visiting speaker flies in to town, we don’t think of their faults.  We never ask if they are in debt, we never ask if their lifestyle is extravagant, we never think if they are impatient or what they are like at home.  We just receive.
  • When you are thinking like this, you have stepped into familiarity.  Try removing the log from your eye before removing the speck from anyone else’s!
• Rating our leaders
  • I know we live in a democracy, our job is to rate and select our leaders.  But Jesus didn’t start the democracy of God, He started the kingdom of God.  You don’t assess the messages, you let them assess you.  You don’t rank the guest speakers you gladly receive from all of them.
  • We once had a lady who missed a meeting because she didn’t like the guest speaker.  She said “Of course I am not going to come for him!”  She was over-familiar with the speaker, and over-familiar with me, not trusting my choices to get good speakers in.  In fact the message that night would have really helped her, but she wasn’t there to get the help.  She did not stay long at the church!  She allowed familiarity to stop her receiving.  Recently, she was unwell and she met my wife, who tried to help her receive her healing, but she just shook her head and said “I’ve done all that”.  She had nothing but familiarity and she sadly left sick without her miracle.
• Failing to appreciate your pastor
  • It is very easy to take your pastor for granted.  We neglect those we are familiar with.  The biggest deception we get into is we honour guest speakers above our pastors!  The pastor is the one who is there sent from God to build you, and they were the gate that opened to bring the guest speaker to you!
  • It is the pastor who labours over you with love.  We are not trying to get a big offering for the pastor and give him a great life – we are trying to help you honour the gifts God has given you because honour brings life

Now you see the signs of familiarity, make the choices to get it out of your life.  Change the way you think, give big to your pastors, turn up at church on time and sit at the front.  You will suddenly get so much more life out of the church, it will be like a new church!

I have been a youth pastor, an associate pastor and an assistant pastor, I have been a youth leader, Sunday School Director, usher, Sunday School teacher – I have done every volunteer and paid position in the church.

Now I am the head of a network of five churches and have some great lead pastors and some great pastors – and as our churches grow we will appoint a lot more pastors – assistant pastors, youth pastors, worship pastors, campus pastors, children’s pastors, and so on.

I was just thinking about this today – what would make a great assistant pastor?  What would I do if I was assistant pastor?

• I would quote my lead pastor all the time.  Don’t get me wrong, I know Jesus is the head of the  church and I know it is all about Jesus.  But it isn’t Jesus who signs my paychecks, it is the lead pastor.  And I would respect and admire him, listen to him and quote him.  It would bring unity and peace to the network, make my lead pastor’s job easier and ensure it was clear the organization had one head.
• I would announce the visit of the pastor with excitement.  I would be someone everyone knew was happy to have the pastor with us and around
• I would tell people how much the messages have blessed me personally
• I would not let anyone come to me with their complaints or negative comments.  I might even have a sign outside my office: IF YOU HAVE COME HERE TO GRUMBLE, YOU MUST BE LOST.  I am not about to become another Absalom in the making!
• I wouldn’t ever get stroppy if someone expected him instead of me.  Imagine I got to the hospital and they said “Why hasn’t the lead pastor come here, why has he sent the deputy”, I would lovingly explain he is really busy and really couldn’t make it.  You would never catch me saying “well, he’s always late”, “I don’t know do I”, “He’s probably sleeping”.
• I would honour my pastor’s wife and buy her gifts.
• I would appreciate all the learning I am getting.
• I would listen to the lead pastor preach online or on CD all the chances I got
• I would flow with the policies the church set
• I would take notes during the sermon and during the business meeting
• I would give wise counsel, without flattery or without manipulation.
• I wouldn’t covet the top chair.  Or his car, or donkey, or whatever!

It’s the start of a very busy weekend here, and I have a lot to do, but I feel the pressing of the Lord so strong to write this blog post right now.  If you are going through the pain of betrayal, don’t quit – keep going!

They asked Derek Prince at the end of his life if he wished he had done anything different, and he said that he wished he had been more forgiving to the people who caused him pain through betrayal.  That is thought provoking – betrayal hurts, no matter who you are.  And if you are a pastor, at some point you will be betrayed.

David was betrayed, and wrote a Psalm about it:

My heart is sore pained within me (Psalm 55.4)

David was betrayed by a man called Ahithophel, the man was supposed to be a good friend, and his trusted advisor.  But he turned against David and David’s rulership and it hurt.  Let’s start here leaders – it hurts when people betray you.  It really hurts, it’s a pain that nothing else comes close to.  In Psalm 55, David pours out his heart and lets us know the pain.  The sad thing is I have seen pastors and leaders who have never, ever recovered from the pain of betrayal.  I do not want this to be your story!

When you preach and teach on the importance of loyalty, some (young) ministers will tell me don’t teach on that, it’s not important, just teach grace and peace.  Then they get betrayed, and they call me and ask where can I get that teaching.  What happened?  Their Ahithophel betrayed them!

Give ear to my prayer O God; and hide not thyself from my supplication. Attend to me and hear me, I mourn in complaint, and make a noise. (Psalm 55.1-2)

That is what it feels like when you are betrayed, you pray but you doubt God hears, you feel like God has forgotten you, you feel suddenly very sobered up.

Because of the voice of the enemy, because of the oppression of the wicked, for they cast iniquity upon me and in anger they hate me.  My heart is sore pained within me: and the terrors of death are fallen upon me. (Psalm 55.3-4)

One of the worst and most painful parts of being betrayed is that when people betray you, they invariably bring false accusations against you. When you hear what people who have betrayed you say about you, you might wonder if you are satan himself!

These accusations get under your skin and they hurt.  They re-describe events and paint you evil; they fabricate half-truths to make you look terrible.  And just days, weeks or months ago, these people were your friends, your associates – you loved them, you trusted them.

It’s part of the pain of betrayal – they “cast iniquity upon you” – they say you sinned and you did this wrong and you did that wrong and you were wicked.  It helps them feel less guilty about betraying you, to paint you as a demon.

Fear and trembling have come upon me (Psalm 55.5)

The shock of betrayal can make you very scared.  You can be scared of failing, scared others will betray you, scared people will believe the inquities being cast on you.

You start to think, well if someone thinks I am a thief, if someone thinks I am arrogant and wicked, how can I ever have a successful ministry now?

It is a real fear.  This fear gripped David when Ahithophel turned on him – he thought his reign was over, he thought his successes were nothing, he thought that he could never move forward, he thought more people would backstab him.

Now LISTEN CAREFULLY – this fear will kill your ministry, not the betrayal.  The first thing that happens is fear, but the second step is also universal:

And I said, oh that I had wings like a dove for then would I fly away and be at rest.  Lo, would I wander off and stay in the desert.  Selah. I would escape from the windy storm and tempest. (Psalm 55.6-8)

Accompanying the fear that comes with betrayal, is a desire to run away.  If you run away from everyone, then no-one can betray you ever again.  When those false accusations come, you want to run away.  I’ve been caleed names before and I just wanted to run away.  Some pastors do – they start a travelling ministry or they move churches all the time, trying to run away from it.  Others run away on the inside, they are still there but not all there, refusing to give their life to others, refusing to help others, hating getting up and preaching.  It’s not easy being betrayed.

The third feeling when betrayed is the desire to get revenge:

Let death seize upon them, and let them go down quick into hell: for wickedness is in their dwellings and among them. (Psalm 55.15)

That’s how you feel about people who betray you.  Let them die and go to hell.  If in pain you have ever prayed that prayer, you are in good company.

But you need to know this: satan sends the disloyal to you to do one thing – he doesn’t care about them or their lies.  He cares about your heart.  His plan is to trick and con you into bitterness and unforgiveness.  That is why I am talking to you today about this!  Failing to love is going to destroy your ministry – not betrayal, not slander, not gossip.  Their behaviour isn’t going to kill you – yours is.  That’s the cunning plan of the devil – to make you polluted with vengeance and wicked imaginations.

FAILING TO LOVE WILL WIPE OUT THE FRUITS OF YOUR MINISTRY.

If you have the gift of tongues, the gift of prophecy, if you are the smoothest preacher in the world, if you have faith that moves mountains – but have not love – then you have nothing, gain nothing and will achieve nothing.  (That’s a paraphrase of 1 Cor. 13.1-3).

Why would you want the accuser to poison me and fill your heart with negativity?  Why would you let them decide how much you show love?

David was honest with his thoughts in v. 15, thank God he was – as you and I have felt the same thing.  But he didn’t keep in that place.  And this is my heart for you this morning: don’t stay in verse 15.  Admit you have been there, that’s fine.  End up hurt and in pain and annoyed and frustrated – of course – someone you trusted, someone you treated as an equal, someone you went to church with and prayed with, discussing issues with (see vv. 13-14) has stabbed you in the back.

Admit it hurts, admit you want to stab them back.  Admit you feel hell is too good for them – we’ve all been there.  But don’t – whatever you do – stay in verse 15.  Let’s move onto verse 16 today:

As for me, I will call upon the Lord and the Lord will save me (Psalm 55.16)

God is on your side.  You are not the tail, you are the head.  Start to call upon the Lord today, He will save you from bitterness, from pain, from the negative voices, from it all.

The pain of betrayal can and will become something in the past.  God will bring new advisers to you, learn to trust them, not reject them on the behaviour of others.  This is your time!

Last week, we discussed landmark people and that some people who have been in your life and lifted it should never be forgotten.

Another thing that must not be forgotten is landmark seasons in your life.  All throughout Scripture, God has insisted His people remember certain events:

Three times a year you shall celebrate a feast to Me   – Exodus 23.14

God ordained that every year the Jewish nation had to remember their exodus from Egypt, had to remember the giving of the Law and had to remember the time they spent in the wilderness.

There are events and moments and seasons in your life you should always remember and you should put on the calendar and schedule time to remember.  The times in which God delivers you supernaturally you should always remember.  I will never forget Saturday December 5th 1993, that was the night I started to speak in tongues and prophesied over people for the first time.   Before that I was a Baptist boy who wanted to believe in the gifts and power of the Spirit, but dare not in case I ended up cursing God in Chinese (that was actually said!).

Now I use the gifts daily, I pray in tongues every day, prophecy has saved my life on a number of occasions and I have lost track of how many people I have seen healed.  That evening changed my life and I will not fail to celebrate it.

You need to think back on your life.  God has delivered you, God has increased you, God has helped you.  Remember these things – put them in front your mind, set aside a time on the calendar and remember them.  Spend time thanking God for your landmark events.

Next week, we will conclude this by looking at landmark places.